I was lying in bed this afternoon… just kidding… this morning and fighting off that first alarm. It was a real doozy too. Super loud. When my head hit the pillow after I finally won the battle by hitting snooze (that alarm clock has no chance against my determination to sleep), the name of our new blog popped in to my head.
It might be a little deep for the early morning, but I started thinking of everything I’ve learned over the last few years. Some of you reading this will know that I went through a very painful divorce as I approached the ripe old age of 30, and that I made the decision long ago to learn everything I could about myself instead of wishing or pretending it didn’t happen.
I found, through the recovery process, that I was often paralyzed by fear. I hid behind my insecurities. I missed the true relational depth that comes from courage. I also learned that true humility comes from courage, and that attempting to build a wall between myself and pain only intensified the pain.
At the intersection of God’s power and our ability we find a tension. God wants healthy marriages for us, but we have responsibilities that are tied to that health. The same is true in everything we do. God may want something for us, but we must choose our own steps too.
God put this world in to motion with a curious set of rules. The prudent path (Aristotle’s definition, not our cultural definition) to success is almost always clear. The results? Those are never guaranteed.
The fact that we can work hard at something and fail keeps most of us paralyzed. So what can help us overcome that icy feeling of helplessness? Lamentations 3:21-30 and Proverbs 6:6-11 both set up the expectation that we should work hard AND trust in God.
I know that God will supply ALL of my needs. I also know, or can learn, the prudent path. So why not step out in faith? I am not guaranteed safety, but if I fail I’m assured of provision beyond what I can ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20). If I succeed, I’m also assured of provision beyond what I can ask or imagine.
Sometimes it’s fear that holds me back, sometimes it’s laziness, but that’s really fear too. Courage is the thing I need, and 2 Timothy 1:7 tells me I’ve already been given that by God.
I’m getting married this spring. It’s going to be different this time, because I learned so much from the last time. I know that I dropped the ball on some big things in my last marriage, and I am determined to be more courageous; which means more intentional, and more available than I was before.
It’s going to be a battle every day, but if my daily defeat of the alarm is any indication, we shouldn’t have any problems. – Brandon